Overcoming Fear
Fear…we all experience it at some point or another.
I watched my wife, Julie act terrified all weekend. She was nervous…kept checking the computer…and wondering what was going to happen.
Something she has thought about since she was young was working in the medical field. A few years ago she finally decided to act on this and went to school to become an RN. She graduated right before we moved down to Florida.
Last Thursday she took her NCLEX test to be licensed a nurse.
You could see the anxiety on her as she left to take the test. When she came back, it was worse. Now she was in terror. She had only received the minimum number of questions on the test: 75. On the NCLEX test, you receive between 75 and 265 questions. The computer keeps testing you until it reaches a conclusion of whether you pass or fail.
Her having just 75 questions means she passed very well or failed very badly.
Since she felt the test was one of the hardest ones she has ever taken, she was thoroughly convinced it was option B: failed very badly. It takes 2 business days to receive the results online. Since she tested on Thursday that means she didn’t see results until today.
The good news is that she passed of course. She is a licensed Florida nurse.
What does this have to do with you? Everything. We ALL experience FEAR at some point in an online business. It’s SCARY learning new technology and stepping out where you’ve never been before.
The question isn’t whether you’re going to experience fear in your online business. It’s simply how you’re going to react to it.
If you’re standing in the road and a truck comes barreling straight at you…the correct response is to get out of the way. Don’t allow the fear to paralyze where you stand there staring at it.
For Julie she was very nervous about her test for the past several weeks. This meant she studied her butt off all day long many days. She went to a Sylvia Rayfield test preparation class. She did everything she could to prepare. Then the date of the test, she showed up.
I remember when I published my first website. I was terrified. What would people say? What if no one ever purchased? What if this never made a dime?
Same experience when I sent out my first email to my list. What if everyone hates it? What if they ALL unsubscribe? What if they send me nasty hatemail?
My first product…ditto. What if everyone hates me and my writing? What if no one buys?
What if…What if…What if…
There is a right and wrong action to fear.
The right reaction is to confront, do all you can, and go forward anyway.
The wrong reaction is to be paralyzed by it.
Over the years I’ve worked online I’ve seen dozens of people who never went forward. They were paralyzed by fear instead. They were afraid people wouldn’t buy their product. They were of course right. If you have a 3% conversion, that means 97 people out of a 100 are not buying! It’s not about those who don’t. It’s about those who do.
Are you afraid someone will send you a nasty email when you publish to your blog or your email list? They probably will. I’ve received many angry letters over the years. I think some people enjoying being angry! I’ve unsubscribed people from my list before because they sent me an angry response every week. Then they get angry because you’re not sending them email anymore.
Someone will complain about your product. The key here is to identify real constructive criticism you can use…compared to just people complaining because they’re good at it.
Many people say FEAR is False Evidence Appearing Real. Are you afraid of that angry email…so you don’t send out any emails? If so, get over it. Get your first one and join the club. It won’t “hurt” you.
Every NEW experience will be scary. You have to overcome it and keep moving forward anyway. The only person not having to deal with fear on some level is the one sitting in the same routine day after day, and year after year.
Keep moving forward.
And congrats Julie…
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Great!!!!
Congratulations Julie. We never doubted you!
Nice post Terry!
Everyone experiences FEAR, but no one wants to acknowledge it
We live in a ‘No FEAR’ world when ‘KNOW Fear’ would accomplish ten times more. You cut to the heart of it when you look at the ‘what if’ in the face and honestly looked at it. Most times the problems we ‘think’ we have are nothing compared to the problems we create through apathy and denial.
I hope you get a ton of great comments on this one. You deserve it!
Phil
ps. If you get any unsubscribes due to this one…they were never ready to hear the truth anyway…at least that’s what I told myself when my series on FEAR got them in my podcast
Great stuff
Well done Julie and Terry – you both persisted and both succeeded!
Alex
Excellent post Terry,
Unfortunately we don’t live in a perfect world, but all to often fear causes people to try to get everything perfect before they do anything. As a result they end up never doing anything.
Thanks for sharing your experiences,
Nando
Congratulations Julie,
I have a lot of fear. I also have a lot of hope. It is nice to know I am not the only one that gets afraid sometimes. I admit fear has paralyzed me some times. (Today is a fear day…well a fear few hours anyway.) When I have those fear moments, I try to remember a saying I heard from Dan Kennedy (not in person, I do not want to be accused of dropping names, but it is his quote and he should be credited):
“The three great essentials to achieving anything worthwhile are; first, hard work, second, stick-to-it-iveness, and third, common sense.”
(Although I Think Thomas Edison has also been credited with the same quote. Lol.)
Mark
Congratulations Julie on becoming RN! That is awesome! Hope you are enjoying Florida!
Terry great article and so true! You hit some key points about False Evidence Appearing Real! Nice to talk to you Saturday over Elsom’s phone. Glad you have moved here to Florida. Look forward to seeing you another time. Thanks for your great articles and products and your integrity leadership!
Congratulations Julie for having the faith in your dream and your purpose to pass through your terror barrier. You are admired by all those who long to do the same and will be an inspiration to all those around you.
Hi Terry
A great post and so very true. I have known fear so very well. I have been in Sales and Marketing Management in the Specialized Construction field (stabilizing historic buildings) in Ireland for the 30 odd years before I came out to CA in Dec 2004, and at each new step in my career, I had to pass a fear barrier.
Part of my job was to do large group presentations to Architects and Engineers at seminars and as I myself had neither qualification, I was open season from the usual “smart asses” in the audience trying to make me look stupid and unprofessional. In the earlier days, this did cause a small problem, but with experience and believing in myself, I got to be real good at taking flack, and usually made an idiot of the person trying to put me down.
You see, when I sat down one evening proir one of my earlier seminars, I thought to myself, I could almost do what these people can do, but none of them could do what I do.I was in a Specialist Contracting field, so keeping this knowledge in my head during the seminars, it gave me great confidence and power, and I actually looked forward to the comments from the “smart asses”.
I am sure you have heard the term KIP, Knowledge is Power. Please remember this when you are on line. Those of us who have been on an Internet learning curve have a lot more knowledge than we take credit for.The people on the other end are usually the ones with the Fear…they are afraid we may try to sell them something!
Keep up the good work Terry and many congratulations to Julie on entering one of the most demanding but worthwhile professions out there today.Well done!
Kind regards
Tom
Congratulations Julie!!! Both you can Terry are the great guys!!!! And thanks to Terry for this great post too!
Hi Terry and Julie,
Yes, first of all, Congratulations! Julie
Since you chose a career helping people, I applaud you for that mainly because it’s obvious that you chose this profession because
Ooops! I believe some of my post got deleted.
Hi Terry and Julie,
Yes, first of all, Congratulations! Julie
Since you chose a career helping people, I applaud you for that mainly because it’s obvious that you chose this profession because you care about people since we all know that you do not need a job or the money with ‘Money Bags’ as a husband.
Terry, it’s kind of ironic that you sent this message today because this is exactly where I’m at at the present time. SCARED and full of ‘WHAT IFS.
I do have a few loose ends to tie up before I can launch my online bizness, but I AM going to do it no matter how scared I feel at the present time.
I have also accepted a part-time position just to be able to afford your help while it’s getting noticed and IF it completely fizzles or doesn’t do too well, but truthfully, I BELIEVE it will be a success because it is not about me, instead I will be helping MANY, MANY people get what they want and need…for just pennies a day…
but, since it is like a Membership site, I know that those residual ‘pennies’ per month can add up to several dollars very quickly which will be great. (But, not only that, I see ways to make a Bizness in a Box, or Mini Franchise plus Affiliate commissions and Advertising to boot.)
I really love the idea of doing something one time and getting paid for it over and over.
Thanks for the encouragement Terry. I AM going to launch soon, but now you have kind of lit the fire under me which may help me to get it done even sooner.
Congratulations Julie – what an achievement…what an accomplishment!!!
Isn’t it amazing…when we set our intentions toward a goal… take little steps each day toward…doing what it is…we want…when the desired outcome becomes reality…we go….”wow! – it’s really real, how could I have doubted?”
Often stated…be careful what you ask for…you will get…what ever it is…you are determined to do…when you do…when you get it….you look back…recoup the energy you drained…worrying… and vow to never doubt again.
The Unseen Force sustains us… causes it all to be just the way we wanted…
De-sire = of the Father… implanted in your heart…He saw you through…
Kudos Julie…Terry too… for this great post on Fear…99% of what we ‘worry’ about…never comes to pass…
well done, i dont think there is anybody in this life that can live without any form of fear of the other, but the thing is how you manage your fear. Some could be as a result of work related fear or finance related fear but whatever fear it is i think we should manage it well less it leads to something drastic. Anyway, in all nice post, keep it up. Paul B.
Well done.
In passing the exam.
In overcoming fear
In sharing
And giving the profession you have chosen in caring.
I just want to know where she’ll practice. You guys live in the middle of no where. Beautiful, but still…where’s the nearest health care facility? Oh, wait a minute. She could be a care flight nurse – flying around in a helicopter!
Seriously, congrats to Julie and all her studying!
I’m like Steven Wright, “You know that feeling you get when you’re leaning back in your chair and you start to fall backwards, but you catch yourself? I feel that way ALL THE TIME.”
I just want to know where she’ll practice.
You just have a nurse fetish.
Congratulations Julie! : )
Hi everyone
I just wanted to say “Thank you” to all for your encouragement. By the way Leonard we are not too far from Ocala…so I do have a few options available.
Julie
Hi Terry
First – congratulations to Julie and well done -another ‘Angel’
Well I’ve just overcome my fear and put up my first ever website!
I’ve taken ages to do it because the copy is unique, the photos are mine, the header is mine – Yes I know – it could have taken just a few days if I’d copied everyone else – but then it wouldn’t have been ‘my site’ would it Terry?
Of course, the next stage is as you say – will anyone see it?
Will they like it? At least it’s not about Internet Marketing -making money!
Have a look – tell me what You Think ( I remember your email you sent when you lost your dog – I’d just lost one of my German Shepherd Dogs in the same week)
regards
Graham
Hi Terry and Julie,
I’m glad for you Julie to be able to fulfill a lifelong dream, but I will surely miss your great help in answering my Email questions.
One thing that I admire about both of you is your integrity and Christlike concern for others. That is a drawing factor in your lives. I also appreciate your good content, Terry, without a lot of sales hype.
In your newsletter, Terry, you talked about doing more videos in the fall. If you do that, please try to speak just a little slower. Being a sight learner, I enjoy your printed page much better….with it I can underline, highlight, read it in the car, refer back to it, etc. Also, it saves being “glued” to the computer, remembering to look away once in a while and blinking in order to save one’s eyes. =)
Keep up the good work and God bless,
Clara Mae Watrous
Wow, Terry likes “keep moving forward”. I raised my sons on that quote. At 23 I took over a resaurant with no prior experience, and succeeded. At 28 I was hired to mange a dairy farm. I barely knew how to drive a tractor, yet had the highest and most effecient milk production in under 5 months.
My point was “keep moving forward”.
I’ve been working online for a while now, no significant progress yet. But I gathered the nuts and bolts of it and have put together a system to get the results I’m looking for. It’s a masterpiece. I was actually debating trying it today when I came across your email.
Long story short, I’ve been staring at my own, self developed system “terrified”. Of what, I don’t know. Maybe that it’ll work beyond my wildest dreams. I hope so. Ater reading your post Terry I remember what it was that got me going years back. Get it going, weed out what doesn’t work, and you’ll have left what does work. A simple process of elimination.
I gotta get back to moving forward. Thanks Terry!
Layne
So sorry, I got excited about my project. Indeed a toast for R.N. Julie Dean.
I have a friend that’s an attorney. He laughs and argues with me at the same time because I adress him as Counselor Jim. He says I’m still just Jim. And I counter with the fact that he educated himself, pushed through to earn that title and so he should be adressed. I give him that respect though he’s a childhood friend of mine.
So here’s to an outstanding person having earned a respected title, congratulations R.N. Julie Dean. May this be the first of many accomplishments.
Layne
Hi Terry and Julie
I just wanted to make a post and say a massive CONGRATS!
I remember how satisfying it was when I qualified as a teacher and so I know how happy you must be right now
Well done on the achievement and have fun reveling in it!
Enjoy the moment and the future career, too.
Well done again!
Cheers
Lee McIntyre
Julie, I know exactly where you’re coming from – Congrats on achieving your dream.
I love writing but with only Grade 10 education, my only future was as a typist. At 38, I decided to advance my education and ventured into a Journalism course. As I progressed, fears arose. What if I really can’t do well in school? (I was terrible in school and barely passed. I think they put me through just to save me further embarrassment. lol! )
I suffered anxiety and panic disorder for several years prior to entering journalism school and went through 2 years of therapy. In my last year of journalism, I had a full-blown panic attack that sent my fleeing down the hall to hide in the student lounge.
Depite the fear, anxiety and panic, in 1984, I graduated with honors from the 3-year program.
After that, I braved my way through many live-changing experiences – from starting my new career to venturing into unknown waters to conduct interviews and get the story. I was born shy, so this was a huge step forward. I ended up with 3 awards between college and my reporting work.
This was proof enough that I have what it takes to do whatever I put my mind to.
10 years ago, I went online trying to sell affiliate products. No fear. Until the past few years. My efforts are not paying off, I’m not making what I certainly should be after all this work, and I’m now reluctant to get to work each day. I cannot handle any more of the stress that comes with checking my sales to find fat 0s week after week – and the ultimate realization of repeated failure.
This new fear is strange to me, so I am now struggling to figure out what I need to do to fix it. I do not know what the fear is, but my suspicion is that it’s directly related to low self esteem. Repeatedly not succeeding has led to severe skepticism about my chances of succeeding. Do I have what it takes? I think so, but why isn’t it working?
My challenge now is to overcome this lack of motivation that is triggered by this fear that encompasses many things, from financial debt to loss of hope.
Regardless, I will always have my journalism experience to fall back on. When I quit smoking, I knew I could do whatever I wanted – my will is that strong. When I overcame my fears, shyness and apprehensions, and social anxiety to move into my new career, I finally had evidence that I have the intelligence to find the solutions and deliver quality products.
Whatever your future holds, Julie, always remember this success and how you achieved it. Use that to strengthen you when you need it – as my success has enabled me to move forward in so many ways.
Terry, thank you for the excellent coaching program… I’m behind right now because of serious tenant issues which are interfering with my schedule. I’m convinced the lessons will help me to find the elusive trail that leads to success.
Sylvia
I had same experience before when I took my board exam. I must say that fear can really paralyze you. Actually, it can take away your concentration during the exam! The worst part is the waiting period for the releasing of results.
Btw, Congratulations and Goodluck!